Is this rude?

[Stuff by Bez]

Let's say I'm playing a game I know fairly well. Someone makes a move that seems... bad.

We've been chatting a bit.

Is it rude to ask if they've played the game much?

I guess I'm just curious if they have a good reason for that move, or if they might want some tips.

[T72on1]

Depends on how you ask the question, and how the game has been up to that point, I think. Certainly if there has been some chatting before and it's being asked in a polite way, I surely don't see it as rude. Then again I seem to be someone who tends to give people the benefit of the doubt, while nowadays a lot of people seem to act the opposite way, taking far too many things the wrong way.

[Blacktango]

You can get the answer btw, clicking in their name and going to the XXX XP tab

[detlefchef11]

It will most likely be seen as rude, whether or not it's your intention. Of course, even looking it up doesn't answer your question as they could have played a bunch of times, just not here.

Maybe, if you want to give them some pointers, you can wait until after the game.

[ViolentSilence]

It will most likely be seen as rude, whether or not it's your intention. Of course, even looking it up doesn't answer your question as they could have played a bunch of times, just not here.

Maybe, if you want to give them some pointers, you can wait until after the game.

Even waiting until after the game you have to be careful not to come off as patronising - the first (and last) time I played Kingsburg I had someone want to do a 'helpful' debrief after, but they had completely failed to observe what had been happening! I had built a building to make a certain action easier, but it had an exception that triggered in 4 out 5 rounds.

Sometimes it can be fun, but it's generally based to let people solicit advice

[detlefchef11]

It will most likely be seen as rude, whether or not it's your intention. Of course, even looking it up doesn't answer your question as they could have played a bunch of times, just not here.

Maybe, if you want to give them some pointers, you can wait until after the game.

Even waiting until after the game you have to be careful not to come off as patronising - the first (and last) time I played Kingsburg I had someone want to do a 'helpful' debrief after, but they had completely failed to observe what had been happening! I had built a building to make a certain action easier, but it had an exception that triggered in 4 out 5 rounds.

Sometimes it can be fun, but it's generally based to let people solicit advice

very true

[Chiffa of Kettari]

Also, this question (and answer) means nothing. "Not playing the game much" does not automatically equal "want tips". For some of us big part of the fun is learning and building our own strategies (some people play because they enjoy the process, not because they want "win big win fast" every time). For me reading other people strategies will be like spoilers for a movie/book, so unsolicited advice probably will make me to lose interest in the game... at least until I forget it.

Also also, BGA is super mobile-UNfriendly, so if you see someone with mobile icon doing something weird, commiserate with them silently and go vote/comment on the suggestion to make "redo" button mandatory for all games. Most likely they've tried to do something else, when BGA UI decided they want to make that bad move.

[nik592]

Not even necessarily on mobile. I've just had a complete brain fail and done a really dumb move every now and again on games I know quite well. Sometimes this is an issue of playing too many turn-based tables of the same game at the same time - I sometimes get confused which game I'm looking at and make a move I meant to make on a different table of the same game. Or I've had it where I go to do something and realise I needed to do something else first for that to work, but due to no undo button, I can't go back.

[Stuff by Bez]

Thanks all for the replies. I think that since the current game can be a touchy topic maybe I'll avoid it with folk I don't know fairly well.

IRL, with a combinatorial game, I might say something like, "Oh, it looks like that position will let me block you in the first turn." and then based on their body language/reply, I might offer them a redo.

[nik592]

IRL, with a combinatorial game, I might say something like, "Oh, it looks like that position will let me block you in the first turn." and then based on their body language/reply, I might offer them a redo.

The difference being, IRL, you and the other player(s) have complete control over what you allow a redo on. Unlike on BGA, where sometimes saying, "Oh, that move will let you block me" might just come off as frustrating because undo isn't available. And choosing not to block them after that may also make people annoyed that you're going easy on them.

I've been offered tips once on BGA, at the end of a game I didn't do well at, from a player who had quite a high ELO. I'd played this game a bunch of times (maybe 8-12) so I wasn't a newbie, but not super experienced either. I said sure, because I wasn't very bothered either way, and they proceeded to tell me things I had known, just hadn't necessarily done in my game. In games I perhaps don't know as well, I can get way too focused on achieving a particular goal, and neglect some more baser foundation type moves (like building an income source). It seems obvious in hindsight, but in a game I'm still learning how best to play, I can't always balance all the elements in my head and I overlook stuff. Probably I'll never be as good as that other player. And I'm not annoyed at them for offering, nor telling me (because I did agree), but it mostly just left me with a feeling of being annoyed at myself.

IRL on the other hand, I will almost always run a bit of a debrief, where I'll usually end up acknowledging I should have done this or that, and a more experienced player might then offer something I seem to have missed. That usually leaves me with a feeling of actually having learned something. It's not impossible, but harder to do that on BGA, especially with people who are basically strangers.