Not saying hi anymore

[ljlevy]

Have other people noticed that less and less players are saying hello, good luck and good game? I have been on this site for years and i find it has decreased. I try to talk each time, but often there is silence and it can feel a bit empty. Any suggestions on how to get back that friendly spirit that was once at bga?
Thanks in advance

[Jest Phulin]

Stand against the tide, and keep saying Hi, good luck, and good game.

Humans tend to imitate others. The more times you do something, the more likely it is that someone else will do it too. Yeah, it's rough, but I don't know of anything else that has a chance of working.

[zespri]

Just wanted to offer a different perspective. Some people come here to play games, not to socialize. Some of them may be on the spectrum. These people see saying hi or gg as an unnecessary ritual that adds nothing to the experience for anyone. I'm sure you do not feel this way, but some people do. It may be difficult for them to see this through your eyes.

I also think that this is not about the right and wrong. It's just that people are different, so it's not necessarily that there is a single "right" behaviour here. It is difficult not to feel a bit disappointed, if you are up for chat, but no one wants chatting, but if that's what people want (or rather do not want) to do, it's up to them. If they are silent it does not mean they are unfriendly. It's just they have different priorities on bga and enjoy different aspect of it.

You might find it more gratifying finding yourself a nice board game related discord server where you can chat away, or finding a group of like-minded people here, on the forums (although admittedly, this forum itself is not very active) and adding them to your friend list to play and chat with them. Bringing a few real-life friends here to play with is also an option.

I did have to leave a real-life gaming group once on the account that people gravitated more to socializing than to playing games, so I'm talking from experience, but I was able to find one where we can just focus on playing and enjoying the actual games - so just find your niche!

And of course, I agree with Jest Phulin - keep saying Hi, and engage with people who chose to participate!

[Pistolero]

Generally I don't even respond to hi and good game because most of the time you never see the players again. On the other end, I often propose a rematch, and when I see that the players come back again, then I engage conversation.
I even also tend to kick out players who don't respond in the chat, as I feel when you talk (when you really talk, not just say hi), it's nice to be able to have a little conversation about the game.
I consider the "hi" or "good game" as the "how are you" in English, which is an automatic sentence that you don't even have to answer.

[Otithes]

Yes, I've noticed that too and it makes me sad. I don't know that there's anything we can do about it, other than to keep greeting the people we play with; but many just don't respond at all (including people I have played with repeatedly). Sometimes I wonder why I bother.

[nanijuni]

In my experience, it depends whether other people are using a smartphone or a computer. It's easier to write and communicate when using a computer with a real keyboard.
A few years ago, playing on a smartphone wasn't great, but the BGA people have since made exceptional work to adapt the a majority of the games for smaller screens.
With my 5 years old smartphone, playing wasn't always easy and I kept playing the same 2 games. Communicating wasn't also easy, so I only kept responding to the usual "gl hf" and "gg".
I changed smartphone a few weeks ago and it made communicating much easier.

[Otithes]

I haven't noticed a difference between people who are on their phones and those using a computer. It just seems like saying anything at all (even a quick gg at the end) is going out of style.

Maybe it's my face

[ljlevy]

Just wanted to offer a different perspective. Some people come here to play games, not to socialize. Some of them may be on the spectrum. These people see saying hi or gg as an unnecessary ritual that adds nothing to the experience for anyone. I'm sure you do not feel this way, but some people do. It may be difficult for them to see this through your eyes.

I am not sure you have understood my post and may have jumped a little to far into your interpretation of it. I was not suggesting that people must chat or socialise, or be uncomfortable with unnecessary rituals. Merely a simple Good luck and gg would be appreciated by more people than we currently see. I have been on this site for years and the change is very noticeable - it has dropped a lot.

As a psychologist I am very well aware of the ‘Spectrum‘ you imply. However, this does not reflect the proportion of people on this website that do not say good luck or gg. I am also able to see things from others perspectives and to empathise. This is my career and my natural way of being. Anyway thank you for taking the time to reply and to offer suggestions. I appreciate the dialogue and all the best. Regards

[agodd]

I am agree.
It's an amazing thing to say "Hi" at the start of a game and "GG", "Thank you" at the end of it.
I truely hope that this thing will diffuse

[brisdaz]

YOu might wish to join the talkative and friendly group and restrict games to it - https://boardgamearena.com/forum/viewto ... dly#p53886